Dec 21 2009

Michael Lohan Still Talking About Famous Daughter

Can Michael Lohan stop talking? I mean that literally. It appears that he has Lindsay Lohan Tourette Syndrome. He really just canNOT shut up about his daughter.

This time it’s the fact that Lindsay has been hanging out with Leonardo DiCaprio. But they’re not dating or anything. Just spending time together. Oh! And she’s been hanging around other famous dudes too!

“They have been friends for years. Mark Wahlberg, Robert Downey Jr., Leonardo DiCaprio and a few others – I think they have a lot of positive things to offer.”

He’s such a shithead. What possible good can come of all this yammering? Well, good for Lindsay Lohan. Michael Lohan, it keeps his name out there, which seems to be what he cares about.

Leo DiCaprio a good influence on Lilo, says her father – Monsters and Critics


Dec 15 2009

Two Comments From The Hive

A word of explanation: I refer to user-generated online content as The Hive. Especially when it comes to comments. I’m often more interested in the comments people

From the story about the two brothers who were homeless and living in a cave and then inherited seven billion dollars.

One:

Bkind7x
12:18PM Dec 14 2009
GOD’S PROMISE TO NOAH AFTER THE FLOOD. Bible – Genesis 8:22 “While the earth remaineth, seedtime and harvest, and cold and heat, and summer and winter, and day and night shall not cease.”

And the other:

Doctor Horrrible
9:49PM Dec 13 2009
Inheriting billions…so easy 2 cavemen can do it! XD

The first comment I don’t even understand; there are some folks who think that if you quote the Bible that makes whatever you are saying important, even if it doesn’t make any sense. The other comment is at least moderately amusing. But what else would one expect from the brilliant mind of Doctor Horrible?


Dec 10 2009

Comment from Steelers-Browns Game

Today in One Nation Under 12 — the childishness of sports fans.
Here is a comment from NFL.com, posted during the Steelers-Browns game on December 10, 2009.
so many breaks in the action ruins the game i wish it wasnt all about the money
Indeed. I’m sure the players all agree with you. They would happily take a pay cut, right?
Being a sports fan changes quite a bit when you get older. When I was a young Yankee fan, I didn’t think about the business of the game. I just liked the sport. Some people would call that “purity” but I would argue it’s closer to immaturity. But when you’re 8 years old, a certain amount of immaturity is acceptable. Desirable even.
Once you get older, less so.

Dec 09 2009

Tiger Woods Emails To Rachel Uchitel

We will add “alleged emails” because there is no proof so far that these are real. But if they are, Tiger is a challenger to South Carolina Governor Mark Sanford for the title of Douchiest Email Of All Time.

“I know it’s brutal on you that you can’t be with me all the time. I get it. It f***ing kills me, too. I finally found someone I connect with, someone I have never found like this. Not even at home. You want someone to witness your life. I want you to lay next to me, lay on me or where ever you want to lay. F***. Why didn’t we find each other years ago. We wouldn’t be having this conversation.”

“Not even at home”? Is he kidding? That’s the whole point, dude. Married men everywhere are looking at Tiger and thinking that not only did he cheat, not only did he get caught, but he PUT IT IN WRITING. And not only did he put it in writing, he wrote bullshit like this.

Well, you know. Allegedly.

Tiger Woods Emails To Rachel Uchitel (InTouch Weekly)


Dec 08 2009

Man Killed His Father By Slapping Him

This is odd. A man killed his father by slapping him. That’s what police think anyway. The headline is “Detectives consider slaps to father lethal” and the man is being held on $1 million bail. After the slap, the father “later died of a brain injury” according to HeraldNet.

So next time your kid wants to slap you, be careful. Actually, if your kid is slapping you, you should consider that serious even if it doesn’t lead to brain injury.


Dec 04 2009

Rihanna Wearing Military Mickey Mouse Ears

Oh, and apparently her nipple is showing. Not posting the pics because they aren’t ours, but here’s what TMZ says:

While on the set of her latest video outside L.A. the other day, Rihanna wore her favorite Mickey Mouse ears helmet and unknowingly flashed one of her weapons.

By “weapons” they mean her, ahem. Cans.

Then they said this:

RiR’s bullet bra proved she’s armed and scandalous.

I have no idea what that means.

She’s a lovely young woman but the Mickey Mouse ears helmet is odd. I guess being super hot and having a good voice isn’t enough anymore.

Rihanna Gets Nip Slipped a Mickey (TMZ)


Dec 03 2009

Bizarre Tiger Woods Mask

So I’m looking for the quote from attorney Bill Sharpe to include in a piece of hard-hitting journalism. So I do a Google search for tiger woods 9 iron. Here’s the first match:

Bizarre Tiger Woods mask

If I didn’t know better I would think that this bizarre Tiger Woods mask was created by his now very pissed off wife, Elin Nordegren. It’s out of stock, which probably means they aren’t making them anymore. Or they just ran out. Halloween was a little over a month ago, you know.

For next year, someone will make a Tiger Woods costume with a golf club sticking out of his head. You heard it here first.

Part of me wants to play the race card with this mask, but I don’t think that’s what happened here. Tiger does have rather, ahem, large teeth. (The image below is from MediaTakeOut.com, I didn’t do it.)

Tiger Woods Yellow Tooth

On the Howard Stern Show today, Howard commented that Tiger Woods looks like his long-time producer Gary Dell’Abate, aka Baba Booey. Maybe the people who made the Tiger Woods mask thought the same thing. Here’s a pic of a Baba Booey Mask. Kinda similar.

Baba Booey Mask

The thing is, when you see a black man with buck teeth, it brings up a lot of bad memories for folks. That’s what made me notice the mask. Well, that and the size of those choppers.

Images:

Tiger Woods 9 Iron PGA Golf Mask Costume Accessory NEW (Amazon)

Gary “BaBa Booey” Mask (FastCommerce)

Tiger Woods Gets a Gold Tooth (MediaTakeOut)

Related:

Pictures of Jaimee Grubbs