DaddyTips.com

dADDy Tweets for 2009-06-18

• “But dad, don’t you want to hear…” NO. I want you to wait until I’m out of the bathroom. I do not want to talk from the bathroom. #

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dADDy Tweets for 2009-06-17

• Reading: “Schools May Get First Swine Flu Vaccine | Strollerderby” ( http://bit.ly/17MBi8 ) #
• Morning News, wherein I go on about Letterman v Palin and a racist SC Republican. http://is.gd/14w6K #
• Reading: “Police Say Mom Left Daughter On Street Corner | Strollerderby” ( http://bit.ly/6Urr3 ) #
• Reading: “Woman Used Dogs To Babysit | Strollerderby” ( http://bit.ly/3q8yS ) #
• http://twitpic.com/7nljt – farm share, week 1 #
• http://twitpic.com/7nrlm – I hit my head on this street sign. Really. #
• Reading: “Elementary School Kids Shown Porn Video By Mistake | Strollerderby” ( http://bit.ly/iYGJ0 ) #

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dADDy Tweets for 2009-06-15

• Is it possible to be both empathetic and self-involved? At the same time? #
• Is taking out the garbage EVER a woman’s job? #
• Reading: “9 Year Old Injured In Car When Mom Grabs Whiskey | Strollerderby” ( http://bit.ly/MtNbQ ) #
• Reading: “90s TV Star Potty Trains Her Newborn | Strollerderby” ( http://bit.ly/EKcvf ) #
• Not new, but worth watching if you haven’t seen it: “Barack Obama Orders a Burger” http://is.gd/12Lap #
• RT @whithonea: Taking MILF up a notch. NSFW or your mom! (yes, it’s a few weeks old, but I’m still laughing): http://bit.ly/Zc1rW #

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Twitter Weekly Updates for 2009-06-14

• Carrie Fisher on the Tony Awards – getting older sucks. At least she’s still funny. (Not knocking her. It sucks for all of us.) #
• ‘Billy Elliot’ on the Tonys – people think this is good? What the hell? ‘OK Billy run! Now grunt! Now tap! Run! Grunt! Tap!’ Oy. #
• Checking the one stock you own 57 times a day is very silly. #
• Great sports name: Omar Cuff, NFL #daddytips #
• Some guy is giving a well dressed woman a hickey in starbucks. Why? When teenagers do that u can say ‘ah, youth.’ This? ew. #
• Tell your kid to stop shouting. Now. Two words – inside voices. #daddytips #
• And what if my kid doesn’t have a fever? Huh? WHAT THEN HEALTH EXPERTS??? #daddytips #
• Me to Thing 2 – “It’s always good to see Superman. Unless you’re a BAD GUY!” #daddytips #
• Thing 2 just called ‘Slow Ride’ ‘So Wide.’ (guitar hero.) a future Weird Al? #daddytips #
• RT @john_sherrod: just watched “Stop Loss” – modern day “Hair” without the music or weed. #
• RT @craftastrophe: Have you voted for Craftastrophe yet? Please do! http://is.gd/Wjld Great site, worth the time to vote. #
• RT @THE_REAL_SHAQ: “Every intersection in the road of life is the opportunity make a decision” – Duke ellington #
• Kids in manhattan playing with a Red Sox beach ball. That’s just wrong. Unamerican! #yankees #
• Should mothers wear the same clothing brands/styles as their daughters? Even if they look good in them? #daddytips #
• Overheard 7 year old: ‘oh look! There’s that Alfa Romeo. I LOVE that Alfa Romeo.’ As opposed to the other Alfa Romeo, that one sucks… #
• When even I look at my clothes and think ‘did you pick those out of the trash?’ its time to do some shopping. #
• out of context it souns creepy – guy saying to little girl “maybe you’ll be as big as me soon!” #daddytips #
• That last msg is why I don’t talk to other people’s children too often. A) they don’t care & B) it can be creepy. #daddytips #
• “I asked for water but she gave me gasoline” – *that’s* a lyric. These kids today. They don’t know what good music is. #daddytips #
• Are there doctors that tell you more than “lose weight”? that tell you what kind of crappy shape you’re in? A trainer/doc combo maybe? #
• RT @momlogic: In a move that surprises no one, the Miss Universe organization has canned Miss California Carrie Prejean http://bit.ly/4fB3lu #
• RT @DrJeffersnBoggs: Sooner or later, we all quote our mothers. #
• RT @tiffy643: A-Rod and Mark Teixeira confront ESPN’s Rick Sutcliffe http://tinyurl.com/m29k3a #
• RT @momlogic: Woman Junks Mattress Containing $1,000,000 http://bit.ly/c95Vz I’m still mad about mom tossing my old baseball cards #
• overheard-The only explanation for that is that u started smoking crack. So u need to calm yr shit… No. That is not my responsibility. #
• Two teenagers are being loud and wobbly next to me. They’re annoying. I’m officially old. #daddytips #
• Going LIVE on BTR at 12:30PM EST-topics include Carrie Prejean and why it’s time to stop beauty pageants. No guest today- http://is.gd/ZWf6 #
• A world where we cannot depend on Mariano Rivera to keep the game close is a sad world indeed. #yankees #mets #stupidmets #
• RT @momlogic: N.J. mom on “Wife Swap” stabs husband with kitchen knife: http://bit.ly/2px5f #
• JOHNNY DAMON! WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU SWINGING AT? THE DIRT? OK, I’m calm now… sort of… #yankeees #mets #
• “A-Rod is 1 for 14 against K-Rod.” Can we call a ban on baseball nicknames, especially if they’re based on the name A-Rod? #yankees #
• And can we please start calling A-Rod The Rod like I suggested last year? Or we could use his Hebrew name, Schmucky Schmuckstein. #yankees #
• HAAAAA!!!!!! HE DROPPED THE BALL!!!!!! That was unbelievable!!!!!! #yankees #mets #metsarestinky #
• 20 year HS reunion tonight. That, and the fact that when I sit down I say “uh” makes me feel old. #
• Other things that make me feel old(er): refinancing my mortgage. #
• RT @lisarinna: Someone please remind me next yr not to have a sleepover then a party next day at 11 WTF!! #
• RT @JackieMacD: ASSRAGEOUS! http://bit.ly/wAPRb #
• RT @THE_REAL_SHAQ: If everytime I talk I close my eyes and stutter, does that mean I have a breathing defiency thru my eyelids- WOW #
• Thing 2 just crashed his “computer” which is an old keyboard and mouse sitting on the floor. Takes after the old man… #
• Ads on Yankee game: alcohol,heartburn meds,food that causes heartburn (Applebee’s). #
• Sounds dirty out of context: “The Yankees need LENGTH…” “They aren’t getting enough LENGTH.” (from their pitchers, they mean) #yankees #
• More sounds dirty out of context: “Longoria does it with his bat, he does it with his glove…” what a perv. #
• Thing 2 says: “I’ll take my bath when the bad guy is dead.” Sounds reasonable. #daddytips #

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dADDy Tweets for 2009-06-13

• A world where we cannot depend on Mariano Rivera to keep the game close is a sad world indeed. #yankees #mets #stupidmets #
• RT @momlogic: N.J. mom on “Wife Swap” stabs husband with kitchen knife: http://bit.ly/2px5f #
• JOHNNY DAMON! WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU SWINGING AT? THE DIRT? OK, I’m calm now… sort of… #yankeees #mets #
• “A-Rod is 1 for 14 against K-Rod.” Can we call a ban on baseball nicknames, especially if they’re based on the name A-Rod? #yankees #
• And can we please start calling A-Rod The Rod like I suggested last year? Or we could use his Hebrew name, Schmucky Schmuckstein. #yankees #
• HAAAAA!!!!!! HE DROPPED THE BALL!!!!!! That was unbelievable!!!!!! #yankees #mets #metsarestinky #
• 20 year HS reunion tonight. That, and the fact that when I sit down I say “uh” makes me feel old. #
• Other things that make me feel old(er): refinancing my mortgage. #
• RT @lisarinna: Someone please remind me next yr not to have a sleepover then a party next day at 11 WTF!! #
• RT @JackieMacD: ASSRAGEOUS! http://bit.ly/wAPRb #
• RT @THE_REAL_SHAQ: If everytime I talk I close my eyes and stutter, does that mean I have a breathing defiency thru my eyelids- WOW #
• Thing 2 just crashed his “computer” which is an old keyboard and mouse sitting on the floor. Takes after the old man… #
• Ads on Yankee game: alcohol,heartburn meds,food that causes heartburn (Applebee’s). #
• Sounds dirty out of context: “The Yankees need LENGTH…” “They aren’t getting enough LENGTH.” (from their pitchers, they mean) #yankees #
• More sounds dirty out of context: “Longoria does it with his bat, he does it with his glove…” what a perv. #
• Thing 2 says: “I’ll take my bath when the bad guy is dead.” Sounds reasonable. #daddytips #

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Laurie Berkner is Stuck in my Head

For reasons I cannot explain, I have the song “Me and My Energy” by Laurie Berkner stuck in my head. (Note: the actual title appears to be “My Energy.” See? I don’t even know what the damn thing is called.)

It’s been there for three days.

The only lyrics I know are these:

“This is me. This iiis me. This is me, and my ehhhnergeee. This is me. This IIIS me. This is ME and my ehn-ER-gee.”

That’s it. There’s more I think, but I don’t know it. My kids don’t even like Laurie Berkner. I don’t think I know any other songs by Laurie Berkner.

I have nothing against her, I suppose. I think she’s vastly over-rated. She’s not even better than Raffi, although I guess she’s not Canadian, and is therefore at least a little less annoying. And the idea that she’s “hot” is almost disturbing. Dads who think that need to get out more. Or watch some TV that isn’t for kids. She’s not ugly, she’s nice looking. But “hot”? Really?

No matter what else I can say about Laurie, having a song of hers stuck in my head is not something I would choose.  Especially not a part of a song. Over and over and over again.

Image: Amazon

dADDy Tweets for 2009-06-12

• Going LIVE on BTR at 12:30PM EST-topics include Carrie Prejean and why it’s time to stop beauty pageants. No guest today- http://is.gd/ZWf6 #

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